To Give A Damn, Or Not To Give A Damn, That Is The Question

Now, this old tweet from March 1st popped up this morn. Almost can hardly even now still name all the various crap that got completely sidelined by 2020 – this year, oh let me count the many ways.

And all in all, certainly in a way many have never been able to say in such an inclusive, international way. Eh? 2020 sucks.

But, and here is me makin’ lemonaid outa lemons, there have been unexpected, surprising, and even satisfying moments. I mean, certainly watching the Twitler lose once a day, sometimes a few times a day, well that has been almost soothing. Oh, let me count the ways, but, I digress.

Together apart, watching wide-eyed at all the many and magnificently horrible and astonishing ways 2020 sucks, is almost this collective conscious kumbaya.

Anywho, that day, March 1st, happened to be my dads birthday, and none of us knew what the year had in store. A couple of days later dad and my stepmom would decide to leave earlier than they intended, went back home to the states, with coronavirus just beginning to reach our day to day consciousness.

Ten days later it was declared an international crisis by the World Health Organization. Not much longer after that, the border closed.

I didn’t say anything mean or nasty to my father, never do, now. Won’t have nasty things be the last words I speak to my father; I will not carry that, never again.

So, I avoid it altogether. Avoid speaking about that man, and what he’s done to that place where I was born. Done to people, places, things. He is destructive, selfish and vile, but if my father doesn’t see that, I don’t know how to make him see. Dad voted for Trump. Both 2016, and this last one.

So, they would have come up for a long visit for the summer, Dad and MsB, and of course with the borders closed that did not happen.

My silence now has distance, depth, and we are miles apart and far away.

One polite conversation, on my birthday, discussed nothing really, thankfully short.

Now stick with me here, but, maybe as critical thinking seems to be off the table for almost half of the United States (my father included), seems prudent to, perhaps, take up the mantle and humbly overthink every once in a while, you know, take one for the team?

So, in that vein, noticed yesterday how so many, myself included, fall prey to the same old manipulative shtick, the gas lighting du jour, the false narrative on the lips of every capitulater, those greedy spin monsters serving the master minion.

Rage against, make fun of, argue with, about this that and the other, rinse, repeat.

How, really, how do we find unity?

“I am a strong individualist by personal habit, inheritance, and conviction; but it is a mere matter of common sense to recognize that the State, the community, the citizens acting together, can do a number of things better than if they were left to individual action.”

Theodore Roosevelt, The Man In The Arena: Speeches and Essays by Theodore Roosevelt

In fact, if we want to think of unity, in terms of any hope in hell of achieving such a lofty goal, perhaps start with not falling for the BS narratives the fascist right-wing scum-bags want us all to get all wrapped up in.

Ignore the blather of the loyal vassals who do his verbal bidding.

Well, eventually, early next year sometime.

Instead of forgive and forget, I say we need to just stop feeding the monster. The monster of greed, and bullying, lying, cheating, that commander of grift feeds on that, just fuels his enormous ego.

Get back to the basics, perhaps. Think and talk more about our community, family, grief, health, and all the little and great, awful and every day that actually means something, and means something to the REAL folks who live side by side.

Fight about that.

Oh, sure, no ones going to agree, but certainly better than arguing about crap that some conartist grifter wants us to fight over.

Focus on things like hope, faith, sharing, stories of reality, of real grief, heroism, tragedy. Don’t get sucked into the straw man arguments that serve nothing but chaos.

Keep Resisting Hate.

For people that are important to you, suppose it comes down to the old adage, of building bridges not walls.

Case in point, when conversing with my maga father have learned to just bite my tongue. Like, seriously, I am not going to waste my damn time fighting a stubborn 70-something southern man who grew up in a world I do not understand, much as he tries to get me started – I steer clear of all things Trump and U.S. politics, least with him.

Frankly, I’ve seen too much, read too much, heard too much, know too much to not just haul off and blawdy rant and rave and say things I may just regret… so I remain silent on it.

Anyone else in my limited circle, few as they are, I have muted, and don’t pay any attention to.

Just lick my paws and pretend they don’t exist. Beneath my attention.

Leo sun sign that I am, it tis my natural state. Flick my tail, and ignore my dad’s need every once in a while to poke me, try to get me to bite back, to react, to get into it with him about his disgusting agolf twitler, but nope.

Silence on this is like a gaping hole with my dad, as he KNOWs what my silence means; we’ve had words in the past. Fought with him, verbal matches, on racism, xenophobia, on many an occasion.


But this is too important to me to reduce to words, to explain to him. So, I give him nothing. He chews on nothing of what I think, because he knows what I think. Words are just not enough.

Well, and, not that I advocate for anyone else to do this or do that, but rather making the point that not all things need to be said, and not all things are important to say, and pick your battles well.

And silence can send a swifter message than words.

“Pit race against race, religion against religion, prejudice against prejudice. Divide and conquer! We must not let that happen here.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

However… seriously, on the grander scale, do we really care?

And, not to mention, unity requires some reaching out, and all I’ve seen lately are folks who probably should just keep their distance, no?

So, the question remains, I suppose, can you actually force unity? I’m not so sure.

You can guide it, influence it. You can turn the other cheek. Yet, perhaps unity is something that organically happens once the pieces are in place for it to grow.

Also, and this I take from an ecological standpoint, diversity in nature is healthy, and some division is necessary for a healthy ecosystem.

In fact I believe that the unity some seek is just out of reach, and maybe not even practical.

There needs to be a recognition that there is a very large faction of the United States that have, quite frankly, been manipulated, brainwashed, and gaslighted for so long by these accomplished cons, that some nationwide deprogramming needs to happen.

So, ok, enough overthinker for now. I will leave with this, as it sums up my thoughts rather well.

“I celebrate ideals of individual excellence, self-reliance, and personal responsibility… But rugged individualism alone did not get us to the moon. It did not end slavery, win World War II, pass the Voting Rights Act, or bring down the Berlin Wall. It didn’t build our dams, bridges, and highways, or map the human genome. Our most lasting accomplishments require mutual effort and shared sacrifice; this is an idea that is woven into the very fabric of this country.”

Cory Booker, United: Thoughts on Finding Common Ground and Advancing the Common Good

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